Dating problem drinker


10-Jun-2016 18:28

Growing up in a home with an alcoholic parent is a unique kind of rough.

As a child, you love this person so intensely and are so dependent on them.

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Had I begun the list sooner, instead of listening to the words I so wanted to believe, I would have saved myself at least a year of heartbreak.

Soon enough, that merry-go-round becomes a hamster wheel and even after you’ve grown up and moved out, you still run races you’ll never win.

And ache for a love deep down in the recesses of your being–in that unfillable void–that you’ll do anything to feel OK and thus you reach out for stuff: people, food, money, status, drugs, anything. When I was 18, I moved in with an alcoholic/addict who was verbally abusive and a perpetual cheat.

If you cross paths with someone who has an alcohol problem, the question then becomes, what will you do with that information?

As you meet and — let’s be honest — interview various dates en route to finding your long-term partner, you need to know how to spot someone who uses alcohol in an unhealthy way.

The simple truth is that a glass of wine or two helps you relax; anything more than that is unhealthy coping with issues of which you’re not yet aware. Sure, if someone orders five beers over the course of the night, you’re going to ask yourself, I hope, is he an alcoholic? Shot-taking is something that many young men and women do, but as they mature and grow into adulthood, this behavior becomes far less common.